Your Cesspit Mind!!!

1) What is a four-letter word that ends in k and means the same as intercourse?

2) What is it that a cow has four of and a woman has only two of?

3) What can you find in a man's trousers that is about six inches long, has a head on it, and that women love so much that they often blow it?

4) What word starts with f and ends with u-c-k?

5) Name five words that are each four letters long, end in u-n-t, one of which is a word for a woman?

6) What does a dog do that you can step into?

7) What four-letter word begins with f and ends with k, and if you haven't got one, you can use your hands?

8) What is hard, six inches long, has two nuts, and can make a girl fat?

9) What four-letter word ends in i-t and is found on the bottom of birdcages?

10) What is it that all men have one of, it's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his, and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?

Answers:

1. Talk.
2. Legs.
3. A £20 note.
4. Firetruck (I will accept Fueltruck)
5. Bunt, hunt, runt, punt, aunt.
6. Pants.
7. Fork.
8. A bar of Cadbury’s Whole Nut Chocolate.
9. Grit.
10. His surname.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Film Classifications explained

U: Nobody gets the girl.

PG: The Good Guy gets the girl.

15: The Bad Guy gets the girl.

X: Everybody gets the girl.

XXX: Everybody gets the girl, her mother, and their cocker spaniel.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Which three British professional football teams have names that include a swear word? The first is easy. Scroll down…
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Arsenal, and (a bit harder) scroll down...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Scunthorpe and (will you get it?) scroll down...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Glasgow F##king Rangers!
(You can, of course, modify this to any team that attracts your displeasure!!!)



Remember I was asking (asking? Pleading, more like!) for an M400 Mellotron? Well.....

I'VE NOW GOT ONE!