A man was sunbathing naked at the beach. For the sake of civility (and to keep it from getting sunburned) he had a hat over his 'friend'. A woman walks past and says, snickering, "If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat." He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you weren't so ugly it would lift itself."
Remember I was asking (asking? Pleading, more like!) for an M400 Mellotron? Well.....
